I'll Find You in Every Life
by hpfanfreak06
Summary: "He told me to surrender once, let the universe do its thing. Well, I'm so tired of waiting on the universe to decide my fate with Finn. So whether or not you think this is a good idea, doesn't matter. This is about Finn and I." A collection of one-shots and drabbles.
1. A Sunset Ending

**Author's Note: This is simply, how I wanted the writers to write Finn and Rachel out. I understand why they have to do what they're doing. If they didn't than Finn would still exist in this universe with these characters. But if I had it my way, this would have happened. Also, this will be a place for random one shots and drabbles. I've got two others that are almost finished. Some are AU others, canon. Reviews are awesome!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. **

The call comes at 1:35 that afternoon. While she's busying herself with a late lunch and the television is playing a classic on AMC. She knows who's calling her from the ring, it was set specifically for this purpose, to distinguish from the others.

Part of her believes it's too soon, because it's only been a week and she had prepared herself for at least two and a half. It's already rung three times, two more and the call goes to voice mail. She debates letting them leave her a message, because it has to be a rejection right?

But there's that part of her that sounds an awful lot like Finn, telling her not worry, she's meant to be a star. So, she hesitantly picks it up, praying harder than she ever has in her life.

"Rachel Berry speaking."

"Hello Miss Berry, this is Clarise Smolders, I am the casting director for the revival of Funny Girl. I believe we've met?"

"Why yes, of course. How are you?"

"I'm fine Miss Berry thank you. I have called you to offer you the role of Fanny."

"I, well, thank you!"

"Is that a yes I presume?"

"Oh yes! I would be honored."

"I'm thrilled for you really, there is a catch though."

She'll have to share the role. That must be it.

"And what would that be?"

"We've decided against holding the production here in New York and have decided to do a short run in the London West End as sort of a trial run, then of course it will come back to New York."

"I'll have to move to London? I'm sorry but there's absolutely no way I can afford to live there."

"You need not worry Miss Berry, everything will be covered."

"Okay, that sounds completely wonderful."

"Good. In the next month you'll need to move to London, where we will start rehearsals the second week of May. The show itself will run through August. A packet of information should be arriving within the next few days."

"Oh goodness, okay."

"We're glad to have you aboard Miss Berry. I look forward to seeing you in London."

"Thank you! And you have a wonderful week."

She's going to London to play Fanny Brice in the West End. It's like a dream really. And certainly not what she expected. She cannot wait to tell everyone. Especially Finn.

He has to know.

His voice hits her ear on the second ring.

"Hey Finn two things. One: I got the part. And two: I want you to come to London with me. What do you say?"

It's around six when Kurt comes ambling into the loft. She's been on her computer searching for hours.

"Hey Rachel, whatcha doin? Are those flights to London!? When do we leave?"

"Actually Kurt that's what I wanted to talk to you about. The producer's from Funny Girl called."

"They did! Oh and they didn't offer you the part, so you need to get away, I completely understand."

"No, it's the complete opposite actually. They offered me the part. But they want to do a short run on the West End before moving back to New York. I said yes."

"That's fantastic! Congratulations! I'm beyond jealous! Have you called Finn yet?"

"Right after they told me, and that leads me to another thing. I asked Finn to come with me."

"You did what!? Rachel he's got classes in the fall and not mention there's no way Finn could afford London!"

"Everything's paid for actually, which is partly why I invited Finn. That and he helped me choose my first audition piece. Not to mention I miss him and what better way to get to know each other again, than in a city where no one knows us?"

"As much as I believe in the epic romance that is Finchel, don't you think this is little bit too spontaneous?"

"Maybe, but when have Finn and I ever really thought things through? He told me to surrender once, let the universe do its thing. Well, I'm so tired of waiting on the universe to decide my fate with Finn. So whether or not you think this is a good idea, doesn't matter. This is about Finn and I."

Kurt was quiet for a moment, studying her.

"While I know I could keep trying to talk you out of this, I also can't stop love. So, call me every day, and save me a ticket for opening night."

"Oh thank you Kurt! You have no idea how much this means to me."

"I think I do. It's not every day you find your person."

"Just one more thing, I'm going to need you and Santana to come with Finn and I to the Justice of the Peace tomorrow."

"What!?"

II

When he looks back on this, he might wish they had waited, planned a real ceremony. After school and the chaos of life slowed down. But watching Rachel walk down the aisle, beaming smile and radiating happiness, it doesn't matter. Because this love story, this romance that started in a high school Glee club, was meant to last forever.

They jetted off to London three days later. And when he's asked where they went or why the hell they got married, he simply says,

"Rachel got the role of Fanny, but in London, so she asked Finn to go with her. They got hitched and are now probably attacking each other like monkey's in their new apartment."

Okay, maybe that's his sarcastic, gossip fueled answer.

The real, honest answer is easy,

"Love."

Because that's what it all boils down to doesn't it? And he couldn't have asked for a better ending.

He remembers Rachel once telling him the story of how Finn told her they were endgame. And maybe at the time he didn't believe it. Because who spends the rest of their life with their high school sweetheart? But then be remembers Finn selflessly sending Rachel to New York and watching them apart. Where despite the distance, seemed to love each other more.

If anyone was going to get the happy ending, it would be them.

Finn and Rachel, leaving everyone behind, directly into the sunset.

His phone beeps, signaling a text message from Rachel.

It's a picture of her and Finn, sprawled out on what he assumes is the floor of their apartment. Finn's smiling at Rachel, with so much love in his eyes, where if you didn't know what love was, you would know without hesitation. Rachel herself is smiling at the camera, so happy he knows it will never go away.

In that moment as he's staring at this perfect example of forever, a familiar song plays from his iPod dock.

_Just a small town girl, living in a lonely world,_

_She took the midnight train going anywhere._

_Just a city boy, born and raised in South Detroit, _

_He took the midnight train going anywhere._

A glass of wine in his hand he says,

"Here's to Finn and Rachel."

**A/N 2: I still fully believe they should at least show clips and photos of Finn/Cory as the episode ends, like Finale B (Rent) style, with Don't Stop Believin playing. That would be perfect. Stay tuned for more!**


	2. As You Wish

**Author's Note: I love writing stories entirely comprised of just dialogue. Which is funny because I used to hate writing it. Title comes from my favorite movie, The Princess Bride. Enjoy! Reviews are awesome!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee.**

"Shouldn't you be in the Romance section?"

"I'm sorry, excuse me?"

"It's just, you don't seem like the type of girl who would choose to read anything from the Classics section."

"Contrary to popular belief, not all women enjoy reading those trashy romance novels. Some of us prefer an actual plot."

"Are you telling me that you purposely picked up _The Canterbury Tales _and _1984_?"

"Well, you got me, Chaucer is for a class, but Orwell was my own choosing. I happen to love the classics, or most anything really."

"But not Romance?"

"Well, good Romance. Unfortunately that's hard to find amongst the _Fifty Shades of Gray _and _Twilights _of the Literary world. And for the record, they're the same thing."

"Really?"

"You didn't know that? Yeah, apparently, Christian Gray was originally Edward Cullen, and the whole thing was fanfiction. Horrifying really."

"That is pretty horrifying. So what exactly counts as "good Romance?"

"Well, stories that go beyond the Romance. Take _The Princess Bride _for example. It's has adventure, sword fights, and a ton of wit. A good romance is where you find yourself rooting for the other characters too."

"I see what you mean. And you said you're in school?"

"Yes, senior year of college here at NYU. Apparently I needed another English credit, which my advisor forgot to inform me of until the last possible moment."

"What are you majoring in? English I assume."

"No, actually I'm a theater major. Primarily focusing on voice."

"So you sing, ah, you're one of those Broadway people."

"I guess you could say that. But unlike many of them, I'm willing to go down other avenues as well. Although, between you and me, I really want Broadway more."

"You know I still don't know your name."

"Rachel, Rachel Berry. And what might yours be?"

"Finn Hudson."

"So Mr. Hudson, do you work here or is this where you pick up girls?"

"Okay you got me. My best friend Puck swore it worked. Find a girl, bring her over to the romance section, woo her."

"And you listened to this "Puck?" I'll just be going now."

"For the record all of it went out the window the moment I saw you."

"And that corny pick up line?"

"I had to get you to talk to me, somehow. It worked though didn't it?"

"Yeah, I guess it did."

"So, would you like to get coffee sometime?"

"Actually I have a better idea. Here, read this, when you're done, call me."

"_The Princess Bride?_"

"I did tell you it was the perfect romance."

"You did, didn't you."

"Well, this has been fun, but I must be going, The Handmaid's Tale won't read itself."

"I'll call you tomorrow! Wait I don't have your number."

"You'll have to read to find it. I look forward to hearing from you. See you later Finn Hudson."

He watched as she walked out of the bookstore, bell ringing on the door. Plopping himself into an over sized chair he begin.

**AN/2: This one has potential for a part two. Look for it!**


	3. Chemistry

**Author's Note: I considered posting this as a one shot, but I like it in this collection. Hope you like it! Reviews are awesome! Also I promise to have a chapter up for both "Lighter" and "Getting Out of Heaven" in the next few days. They're mostly written. Thanks again!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. **

Rachel Berry was prone to scheduling. It was at the age of eight when for her birthday, she received her first calendar. The subject of every month was of course kittens (Rachel loved kittens), most of them lying sleepily in whicker baskets. She would sit for hours in her room planning every month. Wednesdays were always for ballet lessons and Saturday's for reading. At the end of every month there were lines printed, used to add notes. Rachel used them for monthly goals. Whether it be a song sung perfectly or a better grade in math she accomplished every one. This inspired her of course to create a list of lifelong goals. At age eight her list had only three goals:

Become a star (this always came first, it was of utmost importance)

Marry Prince Eric (at age 25 of course and after winning a Tony)

Meet Barbara Streisand

Over the years her list changed (number 2 always varying depending who the cutest boy in class was), but number one, she never wavered on. Becoming a star was possibly the most logical thing. It was only her destiny, and she would do absolutely anything to get there.

So it was only logical that at eighteen, she only apply to the most prestigious performing arts schools. Her daddies of course (while they always told her she was a star) explained it would only be logical to apply to other schools as well, a star must have a good education after all. She eventually forfeited, sending in applications to NYU and Ohio State (not the most logical of choices, but it was close to home, and that pleased her father's).

When the letters came in the mail, she expected nothing but acceptance. To her disappointment (some might call it despair) every school in her dream city turned her away. Rachel was supposed to be a star and it was only logical that she end up in New York.

The day the letter from Ohio State came, she locked herself in her room. Her father's tried to coax her out, even making her favorite dish for dinner (vegetarian lasagna). She ignored their protests, continuing to wallow in her sorrow.

It was only in the morning when the thought occurred to her. Sure New York was where she wanted to be, and all the stars were there. But every star has to have a powerful story of struggling, something that makes them human. Ohio State had a fairly recognized arts department, and what better way to begin her path to stardom than go there.

Rachel moved into her dorm at Ohio State in August. Her father's had offered to pay for an off campus apartment, but she refused, if she was going to create her struggling story, she needed to live like everyone else.

Her roommate, a tall girl named Santana, was slightly frightening at first. For the first week, Rachel slept with one eye open, afraid she might be attacked while in the comfort of sleep. But they soon found common ground, both had dreams of leaving the state of Ohio for something better. Santana planned on being a star herself, of course she never explicitly said what kind, just that she planned on "showing the world my awesomeness."

Rachel auditioned for the fall musical that first semester. West Side Story was going to be showing that November and she knew she was a shoe in for Maria. So as she always believed it would only be logical for her to be cast in the main role. The director unfortunately had some outlandish rule that Freshman were forbidden from holding lead roles. Rachel tried to explain to Mr. Ficher that this was a role she was made for and how dare he not give it her. He was of course unperturbed, Rachel was not the first "diva" to cross his path. She was cast in the chorus.

Her efforts to find her way into the eyes of the arts department were thwarted by general education requirements. Most of the introductory classes for her major were filled for the semester, so here Rachel was sitting in a Chemistry class (which had zero to do with character chemistry) jotting down ideas for letters to the Dean in the margins of her notebook.

"Umm, excuse me, could I borrow a pencil?"

Someone was speaking to her. This was undoubtedly a rare occurrence as most conversations she had between anyone, involved the other speaking second. Her eyes came on the boy (she deduced from his voice, that he must be male) who was addressing her. He looked out of place. Maybe he had turned up in the wrong class. She considered this before she noticed her identical text book on the desk in front of him.

"Did you hear me? I asked if it would be okay if I could borrow a pencil. My mom bought me one of those like 32 packs, but I think I left in my desk. I knew I shouldn't have let Kurt organize it for me."

Rachel couldn't help but giggle. Even in his awkward ramblings he was adorable. And not to mention he kind looked like Prince Eric. Her eight year old self would surely flip.

"Oh, yes, sorry. I've got a whole pack in here. I'll give you a few, if you like?"

He took the pencils from her, smiling genuinely.

"Thanks…?"

"Rachel Berry, future Broadway star."

"Okay, I'll take your word for it. Names Finn Hudson, future music teacher."

She shook his hand, it was the polite thing to do, even if he was almost a complete stranger. This Finn was also a fellow musician, and Rachel never ceased the opportunity to get know them all.

"So you're a musician too!? What's your favorite musical?"

Finn seemed baffled by her question, surprising given it was such a simple one. Doesn't everyone have a favorite musical?

"Well, umm. Not really. I mean I mostly listen to old rock and a few indie bands. Musicals are kind of Kurt's area."

"Oh is Kurt your boyfriend? If so I must meet him, we could have so much in common!"

There was a sudden choking sound from Finn's throat. He quickly took a sip of water before staring at her with horrified eyes.

"Gross no!"

"Why is the idea of a boyfriend gross!? I'll have you know I have two gay fathers who have raised me wonderfully! And-"

"I'm sure they're awesome. And just so you know, Kurt's my stepbrother, hence the grossness, and his boyfriend would probably mind."

Oh thank God. Rachel had never been so relieved (except that horrid hour two years ago (it was March actually) when there was a false rumor that Barbara Streisand had died in a tragic stage collapse), she was planning on becoming friends with him, and she never associated herself with homophobes.

"I am so sorry for my lack of judgment. I have a habit of jumping to conclusions."

"Don't worry, it's not the first time this has happened. There was this one time back in high school-"

"Hello class, my name is Professor Laferty and welcome to Chemistry I."

Professor Laferty was a stout man, he was clearly balding, and wore an obviously tight white dress shirt. His black rimmed glasses spanned the length of his face, and his posture suggested boredom.

"Today we're going to begin our semester with a look into what Chemistry means. So if you could turn your books to the first page, I'll need a volunteer to begin reading."

Rachel eyed Finn hoping to possibly continue their conversation via handwritten notes. Unfortunately his eyes were engrossed in the book, highlighter in hand, scanning for definitions. Rachel did the same, even though this was a useless subject.

When the class was dismissed an hour later, Finn had dashed out without a second glance. She should have known they wouldn't become friends, Rachel Berry didn't have any friends.

II

Rachel woke up every morning at 6am on the dot. An early start meant she could fit more into her day. She always began with the Doctor suggested thirty minutes of exercise, all while reading through any scripts she had for the latest school musical, or a copy of Barbara Streisand's newest Biography. Becoming a star meant she had to be prepared and that met no wasted hours.

Despite her early wake up time, she routinely scheduled her first class at 10 am. Which always left her plenty of time to practice her morning vocal runs, or finding the newest song to add to her already vast repertoire.

This particular Thursday morning had been going precisely how she planned. She was exercised, showered, and her voice prepared for the day. Her first class of the morning was Chemistry, followed by an afternoon of Theater courses.

Finn had said very little to her after their first encounter. Only asking for the occasional pencil or page number. It wasn't that she had not tried to make conversation, but every time she opened her mouth to say something, anything, class would begin. And she was sure today would be no different, Finn would become nothing more than that cute boy in her Chemistry class.

She was almost to the classroom when she remembered that this particular day was the first lab. Dashing to the other side of the science building she made it with two minutes to spare. Rachel Berry is nothing if not punctual.

The lab itself was small, a few beakers and two sets of goggles and latex gloves occupied the tables. Everything was pristine and the smell of cleaners settled in the air.

Rachel stood with the rest of her class, a majority of them fiddling with their cell phones.

"Hello, class today we start with our first lab. Now, before we begin I will assign you to your lab partner. All choices are at random and you will remain with your partner for the rest of the semester."

Professor Laferty begin to read names off a list clamped onto a clip board. Rachel hoped she would get someone who was willing to work. Nothing was worse than doing double the work and receiving no credit.

"Rachel Berry, you'll be partnered with Finn Hudson at station five."

She really should have expected this, why couldn't she have that nice girl Tina, who she sort of knew from her Intro to Acting class? The universe is out there to make her miserable.

Eyeing the room, she found the station labeled with a five, Finn had beat her there. She couldn't help but notice how great he looked. Life was so unfair.

"Hello Finn."

"Hey, Rachel right? I guess we're lab partners."

"Yeah, we are. And I see you've got the proper writing instruments now."

"Oh, yeah, I figured I should stop taking yours."

"It was never any trouble. You can't take notes without one anyway."

They heard a small clap, signaling for their attention. Professor Laferty was up at the front of the lab, writing instructions in black dry erase marker on a white board.

Both worked silently at first, pouring chemicals, filling out the lab reports.

"You're really quite good at this Finn."

He looked up then, giving her a shy smile.

"Well, maybe with the labs, putting chemicals together is easy. It's the math that gets me."

"I wouldn't say any of this is easy, you do seem to have a knack for it."

"It helps that I went through a pyro phase as a kid. My best friend Puck and I used to build rockets, and on the Fourth of July we'd make these fireworks out of coffee creamer. We were a hit with the neighbors, well until we accidently sent a rocket towards Mr. Jesper's mail box. I've never seen someone so mad. Good times though."

"Your childhood sounds like a lot of fun."

"There's only so much you can do in Lima, Ohio. But yeah, it was fun. What about you? Where are you from?"

"Cincinnati. I didn't really have any friends growing up, so I devoted all of my free time to perfecting my talent. My father's put me in everything. Voice and dance lessons, theater camps. They wanted me to have the best. But the best doesn't always include friendships."

Rachel had never admitted that to anyone. Something about the way Finn seemed interested and the way he looked at her made her want to share anything, everything.

III

As the semester continued on and the seasons changed, so did her friendship with Finn. They studied together before exams, eating popcorn and making flashcards. He even invited her to the movies a few times. She had a friend.

Rehearsals for the musical were slowly coming to an end, opening night soon approaching. She wasn't nervous, being in the chorus was hardly stressful. In fact she hadn't had the courage to inform her father's of the musical, they didn't need to know their daughter was at the bottom of the performing arts food chain.

"So are you excited about the musical?"

Finn was currently lounging on her bed, a bowl popcorn beside him (his third that night). He had showed up at her door, proclaiming boredom. How someone like him could be bored on a Friday night, baffled her.

"Mostly, I mean I'm just in the chorus. I don't really feel so much like a star."

"What is it that saying again? No small parts only small actors. You just have to go out there and show what an awesome Chorus girl #3 you are."

"Thanks Finn. And maybe next year they'll give me a leading role. I guess I'm just not used to swaying in the background."

"Are your dads excited?"

"I actually haven't told them about the musical. It's okay though, I'd rather they see me in a starring role. You'll be there though, right?"

"Wouldn't miss it."

West Side Story opened to a full house and Rachel was certainly pleased with everyone's performances (she still believes she would have made a better Maria).

She's the last one in the dressing room she shares with the rest of the chorus girls. There's a knock at her door. Swinging the door open, there he is.

"Hey Rach. I waited for you outside for a while, but figured you might still be in here. You were great tonight. The best chorus girl out there. Oh and these are for you."

He hands her a bouquet of pink roses from behind his back. No one besides her father's has ever given her flowers.

"Oh Finn, you really didn't have too. These are perfect. How did you know they were my favorite?"

"You mentioned it that one time we walked by that flower stand on the way to the movies. I'd almost ran into a basket of them and you said, "Be careful Finn, those are my favorite!" "

How was he so perfect?

"Well, I'm glad you remembered. So, would you like to grab a late night dinner? I've had nothing but a banana."

"Actually I have a surprise for you. Get dressed and meet me up front."

"Yay! I love surprises! I'll be just a moment."

Heading out through the theater and out the front doors she grew more curious as to what Finn had planned.

There standing under the streetlights was Finn.

"Are you my surprise?"

"No, your surprise is at _Romano's. _But I promise, it's a good one."

He opened his truck door for her, she was practically shaking with anticipation, for what she didn't know.

They were quiet as they drove to the restaurant, she was positive something life changing was about to happen.

After parking, they walked into the restaurant, Finn's hand on her waist.

"How can I help you?"

"Reservation under the name Hudson."

"Ah yes, right over here, it looks like part of your party has already arrived."

It was as they turned the corner that she saw them.

"Papa? Daddy?"

"Rachel! Oh honey you were marvelous tonight. Best chorus girl out there."

"The best one we've ever seen!"

She hugged them both, still confused as ever.

"Why are you here? How did you find out? Papa?"

"Honey, Finn called us. He told us about the musical. What your father and I don't understand why you didn't tell us yourself?"

"Because, I was cast as a chorus girl, not even a supporting character. I was a little ashamed."

"Rachel, sweetheart, it wouldn't matter if you were a palm tree swinging in the background, we would be there."

"It's just, you both invested so much in perfecting my talent. And to be at the bottom makes it all feel like it wasn't worth it."

"No one ever starts at the top, Rachel. You know that."

"I guess this will make for a compelling story when I'm asked to write my biography. Thank you Papa."

"Well now, why don't we all sit down. We've got an outstanding performance to celebrate!"

Dinner had gone well. She had been surprised by how easily her fathers and Finn conversed. It was rare that they took to someone (especially of the opposite sex) so quickly.

After saying their goodbyes, Finn drove them both back to campus. She spent the entire twelve minutes and seven seconds trying to find a way to say thank you. No one had ever done something like this for her.

Finn, always the gentleman, walked her silently to her dorm room.

"Well, have a goodnight Rachel. And you were great tonight. If I haven't told you already."

"Goodnight to you Finn, and thank you. It was really sweet of you to call my father's like you did."

"Anyone would have done it. Plus, even if you didn't say it, you needed them there."

"That's the thing Finn, no one else would have done what you did. At least for me. You're my first real friend, and you went above and beyond. So again, thank you, so very much."

Something she had never seen flickered in his eyes.

"You've kind of become my best friend, you know that? You're stuck with me. And I'll never stop doing things for you, okay?"

"Okay."

"Again, have a goodnight, and I'll call you tomorrow."

Hugging her, he left, leaving the wonderful scent of him in her hair.

That night she lay in bed, trying to ignore that noises coming from her roommates side of the room, when her phone lit up.

-Hey, are you asleep?-Finn

-No, Santana is having a little too much fun. Is something wrong?-Rachel

-Can you meet me outside?-Finn

-Sure, be there in a second.-Rachel

Curious, Rachel grabbed her shoes, and a jacket before heading out to Finn.

She found him, standing next to his truck, still in the clothes he dropped her off in.

"Finn? Is there something wrong? Did I leave something in your truck? You could have just delivered it to me tomorrow-"

"Rachel, I just. Look, I've got something to say, so can you please just listen? I've been out here for three hours trying to find the courage to do this."

She nods then, noticing for the first time how nervous he is.

"Okay, here goes. Did you know that when I asked for that pencil, I had an entire pack in my book bag? Like thirty of them, plus extra led. I just needed to talk to you. You see, when I came into that classroom, that was the second time I saw you. The first time, was on move in day, I was taking a look around campus, helping people when they needed it, when I saw you on the sidewalk. You were directing these upper classmen who were helping you move in. Full out soldier like too, it was pretty hilarious. I remember standing there, just watching, and I knew, that girl is important. And then you were in my Chemistry class. For the first time in my life I didn't know how to talk to a girl. So I went with the pencil thing, and then we became lab partners. I've gotten to know you and whether you know it or not, you're not just this amazing singer, you're smart, funny, and so passionate. When it gets down to it, the thing is, Rachel, I'm done being you friend."

"Wait, none of this makes sense. What do you mean you don't want to be my friend? After all the time we've spent together? If you think for one second that you're walking away from me, you have another thing coming-"

"I'm in love with you."

Rachel, for the first time in her life, couldn't speak. Her throat wouldn't release her voice and she wanted to cry.

"Please, say something."

"What do you mean you're in love with me?"

"Let's see, you're all I think about when I'm awake, and the star of my dreams. I notice everything about you. Like how you make lists for everything and you've basically got your entire life planned. How when you're nervous you twirl your hair and that you're not ashamed to cry at the end of a movie. And not just those that are made to make you cry, but the ones that are so good they deserve tears. You're all I've wanted since that moment I first saw you. And I know it's so not romantic to tell someone you love them in a dorm room parking lot, but I couldn't wait."

Someone loved her. But did she love him? As she looked at Finn, twirling her hair between her fingers, she knew.

"When I was eight, I started making lists. Planning my life, like you said. It might change a little, every few years, but I always had one clear goal in mind. Broadway. And until this year everything I had planned was checked off. Nothing ever caused me to stray from the list. And I've always said that I didn't need love until I had my taste of the stage and a Tony on the mantle. Until I met you. For the first time in my life, I want to throw the list away. I love you Finn."

And it was then that Rachel Berry experienced her first kiss. It held all the magic that a first kiss should have and it was a whole lot better than Prince Eric.


	4. Overpriced Rain Boots

**Author's Note: Another one shot. I love how this starts, but I'm afraid I may have rushed the end. Oh well. Hope you enjoy! Reviews are awesome!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. **

I

She meets him on the first rainy day of April. Her bright pink umbrella catches the wind, flying from her hand and down the sidewalk. All of her attempts to run after it are ruined by her overpriced rain boots. She slips, landing face first onto the concrete. But not before glimpsing a tall man dashing towards her, the disobeying umbrella in his hand.

"Are you okay!?"

Her hair is sticking to her neck, her hands are scraped from the fall, and she's sure her left knee is bleeding.

"I'm fantastic."

Struggling to lift herself off the ground, she falls again.

"Here let me help you up."

"I think my ankle is broken."

He pulls her under the roof of a flower shop, the smell of carnations and roses mixing with the rain. Her body is slouched against the wall, knee bent in a limp.

"Do you need to go to the hospital? Can you put any weight on it?"

Slowly putting pressure onto her left ankle a searing pain runs up her leg, causing her to hiss in pain. She tries again, the pain is just as terrible, but nothing feels out of place.

"Nothing feels broken, but I'm not sure I can walk."

"Are you positive you don't need to go to the emergency room? I have my car here, it's just right over there-"

"Rachel!"

A tall tanned skinned woman is running toward them. Even as she pulls off her hood, away from the rain, she looks untouched.

"What happened to you? Why are you so wet?"

"I slipped, these rain boots you talked me into are apparently not designed for any actual rain. My ankle is swollen from the fall, and I'm wet because my stupid umbrella decided it wanted its freedom. Can we please get a cab and go home now?"

"Yes, miss whiny. You stay here and I'll use my feminine wiles to hail a cab."

The tall man who had helped her stood by, watching the interaction between the two. His awkwardness was apparent in his posture, but concern still shown in his eyes.

"I don't believe I ever said Thank You. For chasing after my umbrella."

"It's not a problem, umbrella's are like gold here in New York. I swear the rain here falls harder than anywhere else. Are you sure you'll be okay?"

"I'll be fine, Santana will take good care of me."

Santana herself came sloshing through the rain, a cab had pulled up.

"Come on, roomy, let's get you home."

"Thank you again!"

She wobbled under Santana's arm, cold, wet, and looking forward to that warm cup of her favorite peppermint tea.

Once inside the cab, her eyes moved to the window. The man who helped her was gone. It was only than that she realized she never got his name.

II

Sunday's were a little too busy for her liking. God rested on the 7th day, which was a Sunday right? Did that not mean everyone should rest?

This was not apparent to the rest of the masses. The entire city of New York decided that Sunday was the perfect day to shop for groceries. Rachel usually did her shopping on Monday's. Given that Monday is predominantly known for being the most horrible day of the week, why not add something so painstakingly terrible as grocery shopping to it.

Unfortunately for her, the fridge was missing Milk, the coffee cabinet above the microwave was empty, and she had promised Santana she would make a batch of her famous sugar cookies. The line for the checkout was moving too slow for her liking, clearly she had chosen the wrong one.

She felt a sudden and slightly timid tap on her shoulder.

"Hey."

Shrugging her shoulder, she did her best to ignore it. Whoever it was probably wanted to butt in front of her. There was absolutely no way she was budging.

Another tap.

"Umm, excuse me."

Prepared to turn around and give said shoulder tapper a piece of her mind, she was stopped short when she came face to face, with _him. _

"Oh, hi."

"You're the girl from the flower shop right? The one who slipped in the rain?"

"Yeah, that would be me."

"How's the ankle?"

"It's much better thank you. Heels are still out of the question for a while, but I can get around just fine. Thank you for your help by the way, that day in the rain."

His cheeks tint, only visible to her.

"I couldn't just let you get soaked."

"Well, still, thank you."

Looking towards the front the line, she sees it's her turn next.

Her and the helpful stranger both stay quiet as she checks out. When her various items are sacked and she has her wallet safely in her purse, she remembers.

"I guess I'll be going, but could I ask one thing?"

"Sure, anything."

"What's your name?"

He laughs lightly, sounding a bit relieved.

"Finn Hudson, and your name?"

"Rachel Berry."

"Will I see you again Miss Berry?"

"I hope so."

III

Rachel hadn't seen Finn for a month. She knows this because she's been counting the days.

It isn't like she hasn't tried to run into him. Forgoing her usually Monday shopping trip for Sunday's and walking by the place where he first helped her routinely. It all must have been a fluke.

He was nowhere to be found and she was slowly losing hope. And patience.

This particular Saturday morning she decided to take a run in Central Park. Ear buds playing some Usher song, she took off.

Twenty minutes later, Rachel found an empty bench to sit on. Her eyes begin to scan the people around her. Children running from their parents, couples having breakfast on a checkered blanket, Finn playing walking his dog.

There was Finn, running with a black lab.

Darting from the bench, she ran towards him.

When she couldn't catch up to him, she tried yelling his name.

Was he ignoring her?

She decided it just wasn't worth it, threw her ear buds back in and started back to the subway.

What she missed was Finn calling her name.

IV

A week after she foolishly tried to catch Finn in Central Park, she had completely given up. The rain was pelting into her and her umbrella was fighting with the wind, and her.

She had not very smartly decided to wear those god awful boots Santana insisted on. But they went perfectly with her outfit, and really she wasn't going far.

But then the rain started to pick up and she regretted ever going out in the first place.

Everything horrible happens at once.

First her umbrella makes its escape, flying down the sidewalk, completely ignored by passerby.

As she tries to run after it her rain boots again decide that being useful in the rain is unnecessary and she again finds herself losing control of her feet and slipping.

Waiting for the impact of her face on cement she is surprised to find she's stopped moving. Two arms have caught her mid fall. She looks up to thank whoever it was surprised to find it's him.

"You know you should really stop wearing those boots."

"Thank you for rescuing me, again."

"Well someone has too, with all the falling you do."

"I never thought I would see you again. After that day at the store, I switched from Monday's to Sunday's just in case I might run into you. I really should have given you my number. That is, unless you didn't want it. Which in that case I've just made a giant fool-"

She was being kissed. Under the rain and soaked to the bone. Finn was a fantastic kisser, a REALLY fantastic kisser. Which is why she was disappointed when she could breathe again.

"I'm so sorry, I probably shouldn't have done that. We've literally seen each other what four times? And I'm already kissing you."

"Wait. Four times? That day at Central Park? You saw me? I knew I should have waited a little longer."

"Actually to be honest, it was Frank that saw you."

"Frank?"

"My dog. He apparently saw you running towards me and tried to take off. When I went to stop him and I saw it was you I tried going after you, but you got away."

It was fate. After all.

"Would you like my number?"

"Even after I kissed you?"

"Especially after you kissed me."

"Really, that wasn't too forward?"

"No, of course not. You saved my life, twice, so I'm pretty sure that deserves a kiss."

"Well than, Rachel Berry can I have your number?"

She kissed him then, and thanked God and Santana for those god awful rain boots.

**AN/2: So cliche. It happens though. Look for another one soon! I take suggestions! **


	5. Songs of You and Me

**Author's Note: This is the first of many collections of song inspired drabbles. I put my iPhone on shuffle and these are the songs it gave me. Hope you enjoy! Songs are: "22"-Taylor Swift, "I Hear the Bells"-Mike Doughty, "After Hours"-We Are Scientists, and "Firework"-Katy Perry **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of these songs. **

"22"

Finn finds her in the kitchen. She's got a wooden spoon in her hand, wearing nothing but one his shirts. If it weren't so adorable (and let's be honest, so _hot_) he might laugh at how cliché this looks. He decides she should probably know he's there, so in typical (okay that's a lie) fashion he grabs the salt shaker.

She jumps a bit, but doesn't miss a beat. Finn's dancing terribly and basically has to make the words as he goes along. And the ends he's kissing her and praying for dancing in the kitchen to Taylor Swift for the rest of his life.

"I Hear the Bells"

There's something about finding a corner of New York, that's just yours. When it's New Years Eve and it's snowing and the church bells ring in the night. He's got a ring in his coat pocket just itching to make that all important appearance. This is the last time he's doing it, she'll say yes. He knows. So as the bells continue with the notes of Auld Lang Syne he sees it all.

She looks beautiful.

"After Hours"

Tonight they both chose some podunk bar in Lima. Now it's 2 am and somewhere there's a diner. A twenty-four hour one, that sells perfect apple pie and coffee. They only met about four hours ago. She had a girly drink, strawberry flavored and an umbrella. He had a beer and saw her five chairs away. He talking wasn't awkward or new, it was oddly familiar. She requested they go somewhere else, when the bar closed, calling taxis.

Their hands are apart, he wants to reach for hers.

They find that diner. He gets the apple pie. She sips on a butterscotch milkshake. He can tell she's afraid he'll say no when she suggests the park. She like the stars. They sit on the swings and watch the sunrise.

It's an after hours kind of love.

"Firework"

It takes years before he remembers.

"I see stars when I kiss you."


	6. Songs of You and Me 2

**Author's Note: I'm addicted to these. Songs included are: "Billionaire"- Travie McCoy, "Dancing Queen"-Abba, "For the Moment's I Feel Faint"-Relient K, "Lullaby"-Creed, "This Kiss"-Carly Rae Jepsen, "Jet Lag"-Simple Plan, "U+Me=Us(Calculus)"-2Gether, "Here's to the Night"-Eve 6, "Girlfriend"-Avril Lavigne, "Stealing Cinderella"-Chuck Wicks.  
**

**Disclaimer: I do own Glee or any of these songs. **

_"Billionaire"_

She sees him on the street. On one of those perfect corners for the world to hear you. He's playing guitar. But she can tell from his hands and the way he taps his foot, that he's not really a guitar player. His voice is nothing like hers. It's soft, made to listen to while lying on the floor on a Friday night. She thinks she wants to hear it for the rest of her life.

A twenty dollar bill is dropped into his guitar case along with her phone number.

_"Dancing Queen"_

Disco will always suck. Having a wide knowledge of music has always been extremely important to her. A must if she wants to be as special as she says she is. But she doesn't have to like it. It doesn't make her _feel. _

She only remotely likes when she's had to many martini's and someone hands her a microphone.

_"For the Moments I Feel Faint"_

Her parents brought her up Jewish. A faith that tells her Jesus Christ was a prophet, not a part of a Holy Trinity like Christian faith says. So God himself is all she knows. But right now her world is slowly depleting, falling apart and sending her into a place she doesn't want to be. She's been praying to anyone, anything. Finn is Christian. So she thinks that maybe if she believes, fully believes that for a moment she is too, and prays to the Father, Son, and the Holy Spirit that everything will be okay. She has to hope.

It's all she has.

_"Lullaby"_

Watching him rock her, sing to her, is the most perfect thing.

_"This Kiss"_

House parties are loud and littered with red Solo cups. But he's here, so she is too. They've been watching each other, between pretending to be interested in the conversations around them. Somehow they break away and stand in front of each other. His left hand is playing with the hem of her sweater, she's got hers on her drink. Eyes lock.

10…That left hand goes around her waist…9…Her right hand tangled in his hair…8…He's leaning in…7…She tilts her head down…6…He tilts her chin up…5…She blushes, a little nervous…4…He takes her drink…3…"Hi"…2…"Hi"…1.

She's a goner. He is too.

_"Jet Lag"_

This time difference is a pain in the ass. Living your dream is one thing. But being apart makes it seem like a waste of time. All they have are late night/early morning phone calls. A picture in her car, her face on his phone.

He tells her five more days. She says she can't wait.

_"U + Me = Us(Calculus)"_

She's completely delighted when she finds out. Finn, her fiancé, was in a boy band.

"So, wait, did you dance? Please tell me you performed."

"Once. We were totally a hit. And also Puck was in it too."

"Oh, this is so fantastic. Is there video?"

They watch it about two hundred times that night.

_"Here's to the Night"_

He's got friends. So many of them. But how many actually matter? Like who will he talk to in five or even ten years?

Still, in this moment, with red hats flying and confetti falling down upon them, he doesn't want to say goodbye to anyone. Even the assholes who made his life hell. But the one person he can't even fathom seeing again, is her.

Tomorrow he's putting her on a train.

_"Girlfriend"_

He knows she hates her. Hell, he hates her too, even if he doesn't have the balls to admit it. The problem is, this is easy. And maybe some part of him loves her, but it can't be real love. Not when the other girl looks at you the way you want to be looked at and tells you you're special.

He hates his girlfriend.

_"Stealing Cinderella"_

The second time was worse. Okay, maybe he hadn't done it yet. But the last time he was here, he was asking for help to send her away to chase her dreams.

He really hoped they'd say yes.


	7. Songs of You and Me 3

**Author's Note: I cannot stop writing these. There are a few I might consider turning into full stories (from this one and the other two parts). Also look for some follow ups to some of the one shots! Thanks for your feedback! It always makes my day. =) Songs included are: "Into the Sun:"-Lifehouse, "Anyone to Love"-Michael Buble, "City of Blinding Lights"-U2, "Moonlight Sonata"-Ludwig Van Beethoven, "Christmastime is Here (Instrumental)"- Vince Guaraldi, "Buddy Holly"-Weezer, "I Saw it On Your Keyboard"-Hellogoodbye, "Find You There"-We the Kings. I recommend listening to these songs before reading the drabble's, it helps set the mood. =) **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee or any of these songs. **

"_Into the Sun"_

Seams are slowly tearing. Not that either of them have ever really pieced themselves back together. He let her go. She stayed away. But now they're both in the same city, grumbling about the horrible New York winters and how hard it is to get a taxi. Blending in.

It starts at a random coffee shop. Opposite sides of the room, pretending not to notice the other. Before they both get the nerve to say hi and suddenly it's every Sunday, because that's her day off. Smiling is easy, rebuilding is hard. Love is worth it.

Everything's warm again.

* * *

"_Anyone to Love"_

Whiskey is strong. It used to be a gentleman's drink, before Jack Daniels. It takes the world away though, he doesn't have to think.

This is every other night, until the light hits his alcohol hazed eyes. If he's brutally honest, this life that he's living, it's nothing. Sometimes he wonders why he came to this city, left his blonde bombshell in a country field of Daisies. Nothing's easy or has any kind of explanation. But he keeps wondering.

When his glass is empty and light is alive, he leaves. The morning hums with cars and people with coffee. He's got work in a couple hours.

Glancing ahead, hands drawn to the pockets of yesterday's suit, he sees her. And for some reason, he stops wondering.

* * *

"_City of Blinding Lights"_

New York had lights. Tall buildings with thousands of windows and Times Square. But this city, Paris, is so much more.

He watches her, eyes in awe of the streets. She's got her favorite dress on (second to only to her wedding gown) and God, she looks so beautiful tonight. There's this pastry shop down the way, and he knows she can't resist. She'll say the deserts are for later, but he'll catch her licking her fingers before they even make to the restaurant.

There's so much he loves about her in this city.

* * *

"_Moonlight Sonata"_

She's crying. He wants to make it stop. Tell her that they'll have more moments like this. That war won't tear them apart forever. Promises are useless when you know you can't _really _ promise.

For now he'll hold her hand, pull her close and dance with no music.

At the end of the night, she's still crying and he's still avoiding promises.

* * *

"_Christmas Time is Here (Instrumental)"_

Her first Christmas without him isn't really Christmas. All the decorations are out, an Angel on top the tree and few presents underneath. But he's not here, so none of it really means anything.

It's cold out, snow resting on rooftops, she needs this though. Just a glance at her star and for a moment he's there, and life is how it's supposed to be. Then the moment is gone and it's just her. Alone, without the one person who makes her world vibrant and colorful.

She prays Santa comes though next year.

* * *

"_Buddy Holly"_

He finds her outside the girl's bathroom. Some assholes on the football team used a paint bucket of blue colored slushy as a weapon. There are small puddles around her and he can't tell the tears from the syrup on her face. She's pulling and pulling at the door, he hears laughing behind it. He's pissed and hopes he's clear with the bitches behind the locked door. They finally come out, laughing, if they were dudes, he would make them _listen._

Leading her inside, he locks the door. Cleans her off with that awful smelling hand soap and paper towels. Just enough to take her home.

She looks so wounded. It breaks his heart.

"I love you. It's you and me okay? No matter what they do, it's you and me."

* * *

"_I Saw it on Your Keyboard"_

Writing her a song is a hell of a lot harder than he thought it would be. He's been watching her all summer, not in a creepy stalkerish kind of way, more of he's completely hypnotized by her (he's not sure how else to put it, he really _can't _stop staring). She's this amazing singer and has been running the Camp Production of Into the Woods. This was his first year as a counselor at Star Summer Camp, the college he's attending requires stuff like this.

They've got this talent show on the last night of camp. The counselors and campers showing what they're made of (it's a pretty intense, fun, but intense, camp). He signed up, hoping to impress her, but how is he supposed to do that when he can't come up with anything?

There's singing coming from the cabin next to his. It's her voice. And for some reason as he stops and listens, it all comes to him.

He's totally going to win her heart.

* * *

"_Find You There"_

They've been best friends since they were six. She lives next door, just a yard and a window away. Right now, he needs her. They've always needed each other, but right now he's desperate. Because his mom doesn't understand and his step-father is too involved in his own son's life to notice.

-Can I come over?-

-I'll leave the window open-

He climbs the trellis like he has since he was tall enough to do so. Her light is on and she's sitting on her bed, tapping her fingers against her bed spread. She jumps up the moment she see's him.

"Finn what's wrong?"

"Is it okay if we don't talk about it, at least for a while?"

She nods, leading him to her bed.

And while he's holding her, crying silently into her sweater, he knows. They're not just best friends.

They're soul mates.


	8. Songs of You and Me 4

**Author's Note: Back with another one of these. But I've got a sequel to Chemistry almost finished, and have a new story in the works! Thanks for any reviews, favorites and follows! Songs are: Mr. Brightside-The Killers, Love Drunk-Boys Like Girls, What Makes You Beautiful-One Direction, Love Song for No One-John Mayer, The Adventure-Alien's and Airwaves, Olive You-Dave Days, Superman-Taylor Swift, Why Should I Worry-Billy Joel, Applause-Lady Gaga, Ready or Not-Bridgit Medler. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Glee. Or any of these songs. **

_Mr. Brightside_

There's a light coming from a back room. He hoped it's just the bathroom, left on for comfort.

But then he sees their silhouettes in the window.

Her dress comes off.

He closes the curtains.

_Love Drunk_

"Is this a summer thing?"

"What do you mean?"

"When August comes and you go to New York and I go wherever I'm going, will this be it?"

"I'm not sure, all I know right now, this very moment, is I'm here with you and I don't want to think for a second about any kind of ending."

"Okay."

He wishes every star that night as they lay in his truck bed, he doesn't want Goodbyes.

_What Makes You Beautiful_

She brings those pictures in. Her nose all doctored to look like a girl who pushes her down. He hates it, because thinking about her changing in the worst way kind of breaks his heart. And he's sitting there, listening to the rest of them say everything but the right thing. So, despite what the consequences are and the lecture he's sure to get later, he says it.

"Would you stop? You're beautiful."

_Love Song for No One_

Friday.

He's alone with nothing but a beer and old records. When his mother came with a few more of his things he didn't expect the box. It's filled with high school yearbooks, letters from ex-girlfriends, pictures he's not sure why he kept. In those four years he wrote a lot of half assed poems, an attempt at love songs. He's been alone for three years or so, but he's okay. At least he says he is. Taking out a notebook he decided to try again, and in an hour he's written it.

As he sings the chorus for the third time a knock comes. Standing he opens the door, expecting an angry neighbor.

"Hi my names Rachel Berry, I live next door and I just wanted to tell you how beautiful that song was you were just singing. Who wrote it?"

"Umm. I did, it's nothing."

"Well, Mr. it's nothing, you have a talent. Don't let anyone tell you otherwise. It's a shame to see good talent go to waste. I'll see you around."

"See you around."

He thinks he likes Rachel Berry in apartment 4B.

_The Adventure _

They're moving fast. The windows are down and the music invading their ears. All of them are piled in a rented van. This is the last summer of their youth, before the world forced them to see everything differently. It was last minute decision, packing what they could find and leaving in the night. The girls running barefoot in the dewy grass.

They have no idea where they're going only that this is them and life and love

and adventure.

_Olive You_

He honestly can't stop watching her. She's sitting on the counter with this jar of green olives and clearly enjoying them. At first he wants to tease her for it, (because eww gross) but instead he relied on a corny joke.

"Olive you."

She just laughs, setting down her jar and kissing him with her olive lips.

"Olive you too."

_Superman_

She knows he has a secret. It's there hiding behind his "Good morning Miss Berry" and the way he glances around like he's waiting for something. Sometimes she can't help being a reporter and starts investigating (she refuses to call it snooping). All she knows is he grew up in this tiny farm town outside of the city. Quarterback of the football team, all-American. He's adopted, but there's no history of where he came from. Nothing really incriminating. So she stops.

It's been a horrible day, (Mr. Shuester does not understand her writing style at all) and she wants nothing more than to go back to her apartment with a glass of wine. She doesn't see it.

A car comes out of nowhere, driving directly through the crosswalk and a red light. Suddenly strong arms are around her and she's lifted up.

"Are you okay Miss?"

She nods her head, as he's setting her down on the sidewalk. Before she can say thank you, he's gone. That's when it registers. She knows that voice.

Finn Hudson is Superman.

_Why Should I Worry_

He totally blames his three old son. Chris has been obsessed with "Oliver and Company" for weeks now. And his wife, somehow thought it was a great idea to put their son's music on his iPod. (She claimed it was for car rides.) But anyway, he's walking to work and the song the dog sings comes on. Damn shuffle.

First he starts bobbing his head (he can't help it, it's Billy Joel), tapping his fingers against the strap on his bag. But he starts to get into it and suddenly people are staring. He's broken out into song in the middle of the sidewalk .

Thank God this is New York.

_Applause_

"Why is your face painted life that?"

"It's for that interpretive dance class I signed up for. They suggested coming with a prepared piece."

"That still doesn't explain why you look like an easel."

"Come on Finn. Really? I'm Lady Gaga! I figured I should go all out. Considering how expressive Gaga is. She's constantly changing…Also it may have been Kurt's idea."

"When have you ever taken Kurt's suggestions seriously?"

"I'll go wash my face."

_Ready or Not_

He's sitting on one of those crappy lawn chairs, the kind that start to fray from too much sun.

The fire makes his eyes look perfect.

Someone suggests leaving the sand for a night swim. She declines.

He stays.

She can hear laughing in the ocean breeze and decides to make a good impression.

Tugging her sweater around her, she plops into the chair next to him.

They're both gone when the others get back.


	9. Person

**Author's Note: This is some major angst. This will be the only time I will probably write something like this. But I think it needed to be written. Hope it flows okay, I wrote this fairly quick. Thank you for reading! **

**Disclaimer: I don't own Glee. **

He's gone and she doesn't know what to do, or even how she feels. If this were anyone else, she might have offered to help with the funeral, sing a poignant song about life and death, but it's him. And because it's him, she's done nothing but stare straight ahead, a bottle of wine in her hand.

The alcohol is supposed to numb her, but she was numb the moment she heard, so she doesn't really feel any different or better.

Her body fights with her, telling her to sleep. She can't though. If she sleeps, she'll wake up and it will be one more day without him. So instead she lies in bed for hours, her phone pressed to her ear, listening to all the voicemails she saved. For the first week she called his phone over and over, just to believe, for a second that he might answer. Then his number was disconnected. And soon her voicemails will permanently delete themselves.

She's terrified she'll forget his voice. It was her favorite. A voice that made her feel everything at once. And if it leaves, she won't feel those things anymore.

Sometimes she'll find herself watching the door. Waiting for it all to be over. Because that dream she had of life, it can't be gone. She doesn't want to be alone.

There were times, during those first few months in New York, where she pictured what it might be like to move on. But in those pictures he was still a tangible thing. If she ever decided she wanted him and he wanted her, they would just…find each other again.

It doesn't matter if all her dreams come true and the world adores her. If he's not there, she knows none of it will mean anything.

She used to have dreams, nightmares, where a Tony was presented to her. Everything would be perfect, her feet doing exactly what they're supposed to do up the stairs, a smile radiant and grateful. But then when the award was in her hands and she had to say her thank you's, she would realize she didn't have anyone to thank. No one to say "Thank you for loving me" to, just her and…her. She never thought those nightmares might come true.

He was _her person. _How are you supposed to move on from your person? That's why when you find them, you spend the rest of your life with them. Because when they die, you don't feel whole anymore. She's only nineteen, and she's doesn't feel whole. It's too soon, but life likes to throw a lot of too soon's, probably to teach you something or make you stronger. But this, it's just wrong.

When she thinks like that, she cries for hours.

So she tries to calm herself by stepping onto her balcony and staring up at the stars. But she cries anyway, because it's New York, and there's nothing to see.

She thinks about the last time they were together. When she'd woken up, in a twist of blankets, he was still sleeping, head on his arm, facing her. If she had moved just a few inches, closer to him and his warmth, things might have turned out differently. But she left him, deciding the time wasn't right. Even as she stepped outside the hotel room, she considered turning back. Taking her dress off and giving up on surrendering. She didn't though. Boy she wishes she could take it all back.

For just one more moment in her favorite place. With her favorite person. Whispering "I love you"'s in the dark, and feeling his breath on her neck.

Hear his laugh. Listen to him sing. His hand in hers.

Just one more time.

She still doesn't know how she feels.

**AN/2: Heavy, I know. I promise to write something much happier next. =)**


End file.
